Seven Days in Sunny June

Youtube that, O Readers, you won't regret it! Or perhaps you will.... In which case, you would do well to youtube People in Planes, Music that won't Disappoint. Token Trapped Woman is a particular favourite of mine and recalls days spent Geothermal Hopping and descending to lands largely unexplored. The four year anniversary of Fairyland draws near! How is that possible? And the impending event reminds me of my greatest unfinished project ever: the completion of the Expedition ManBearPig story. Geez, hopefully one day I'll get my act together and just have done with it.

For those of you unaware of this week's Big Deal in Television, allow me to inform you that you missed the season 4 premiere of True Blood, summer's greatest smut television programming. Huzzah! I think the writing is fairly legit, however, and the actors/actresses all play their characters really well. They have even mastered the Southern Accent, though the majority of them hail from other parts of the U.S. or from other countries. A big thanks goes out to Starbucks Mike, who was lovely enough to host us for the premiere in his BASEMENT.

After freaking out over the debut of True Blood, we proceeded to watch a special on the Waverly Hills Sanatorium, a former hospital in Louisville, KY, that housed tuberculosis patients in the early-mid 1900s. 63,000 patients died before an antibiotic was created, and the place is now said to be "one of the most haunted locations in the world." Mike has been there and claims to have taken a picture that features a small ghost boy. He also saw the Shadow People, which roam the hallways and appear to walk toward you. We are now planning a night-time 2-hour tour to visit the hospital and see for ourselves.... Scary stuff perhaps!

Anyway, I am about to be booted from my library computer session so I must wrap up this post. If I don't update for several months, I was either eaten by a ghost.... or decided to return to my previous lapses in blogging. It's probably gonna be the latter....

Cheers.

Lover's Leap and the Elusive Tomato

I meant to post a few days ago, when I came home severely psyched out on iced coffee, but the Crash unfortunately followed my arrival home quite closely and I went to bed instead. Tuesday's lesson: Make sure that iced coffee pitchers have not been pushed behind other things in the fridge before re-brewing or you'll have to drink all of the excess to hide the error from shift supervisors. Pretty sure a fellow barista and I killed an entire pitcher and a half. We were uncomfortably energetic.

Guess what though??!! My illustrious career as a Starbucks barista is about to come to an end because.... I got a new job!!!! What what!! And it's not a sh**ty downgrade! It actually requires a college degree!! Yippee!! I shall take up my role as a US Bank banker (BANKER, not teller!!!!) in mid-July. Huzzah!

We went camping two days ago with friends at Red River Gorge, which is about 45 minutes from Lexington. I'll share pictures in my next post cos I'm too lazy to retrieve the camera right now. Good times were had by all! Camping always reminds me of time spent backpacking in Yellowstone, however, and I get homesick. Someday soon we'll return to the most brilliant place on earth....

Cheers.

Drop Zone

My readers, who eagerly await updates of my oh so exciting life, should be pumped to learn that I was in SoCal last week. What what! My sister and I enjoyed a day in San Francisco and then spent the next morning and afternoon driving to San Diego. We were able to spend a few hours at Ocean Beach (maybe that was the name?? not sure....) and frolic about in the Pacific before getting extremely wasted in downtown San Diego bars. Ha, just kidding. The third day we chilled at San Diego Sea World and were part of the very last audience to watch Shamu (all four of them.... very confusing.... the original is probably dead, kids....) perform "Believe." O, the memories! One day I might be able to share pictures of the affair.... if only I could figure out how to get them from the phone to the laptop. Blast my technological incompetence!

In other news.... I was not excited to return home, but lattes must be made and excellent customer service rendered so that the cat might have chow. Such is life. I recently considered applying for Flight Attendant positions, but I find that such a career may not be compatible with my intense fear of flying. Travelling is excellent fun. Flying solo with an overactive imagination is not. I wish we could "poof" to our destinations.

Anyway.... I'm out to go swim in our dirty, child-filled apartment complex pool. Huzzah!

Ode to Sweet Pea

Ah God, the first post of this year appears in May. The consistent lack of updating is really quite distasteful, I do think. In my defense, I have begun several posts but left them discarded in the "draft file," as they mostly focused on my hatred for my current job. Who wants to read about that?? No one. Here's an idea: instead of wasting loads of time complaining about the job, why not channel that energy into finding a new one? Ah, but that would be too easy and logical, O Readers! Indeed.

Anyway, if I can ever figure out how to transfer pictures from my new touch phone (that's right, bit**es, it's a motorola citrus, much more efficient than an iphone....) to the computer, I would like to relate my stories of the Newport Aquarium and Tornado Warnings. I have an excellent shot of my fellow coworkers huddled round in the women's bathroom during lockdown, as a large funnel passed through Lexington just miles from our store.

In other news, I have been following the current cycle of America's. Next. Top. Model., as I hope all of my readers have. I must confess to disappointment in this season's final contestants.... One is angry and foul-mouthed, one is mousy and cries too much, and the third is boring and needs to learn how to enunciate. Alas, if only we could bring back the CariDees and Melroses of past Top Models! Even the cycle villains are lack-lustre. At least Tyra is still pretty entertaining, and I am quite in love with Mr. Jay. Huzzah!

And look, we have now produced a post! Quick, to the publish button! This one shall not waste away with its brethren in the Dreaded Draft File, from whence no post shall return!!!!

Cheers.

What you Waitin' For, Foo'?

So.... with the coming of the new year I have decided (as I always do.... as most people always do....) that changes must be wrought upon my current lifestyle. My day mostly consists of preparing coffee beverages for Lexington's elite (and for the occasional savage who fails to recognise the difference between a latte and a cappuccino) and sleeping. As you might imagine, nothing about that routine is even remotely inspiring and I fear that my life has become a shell of its former self.... Ah, the drama inherent in old cliches.... I think it's time that such concepts as "exercise" and "sensible eating" no longer register warning bells in my head and leave a sick sensation in my gut. A jog around the block will not kill me unless I run in front of a bus, and even then the bus, and not physical exertion, will have been the unlikely culprit.

In other news.... I have now watched all three seasons of True Blood and eagerly await the airing of season four. However, our lack of souped-up cable options presents a problem, since we cannot watch the episodes as they air.... unless some clever series devotee streams the episodes illegally online.... Ha, not that I support that kind of thing AT ALL. Geez.
Anyway.... that's about all I got. Onward!

Cheers.

Slept Right Through It

The rabble's getting uppity due to the stunning lack of recent posts, so I now take to the Blog to update my three regular readers.... I shall begin by first issuing a warning: Readers, beware when entering your local Starbucks! Flavoured Via (a.k.a. flavoured instant coffee.... cos that's pretty much what it is, no matter how much the barista on shift insists the contrary) was unveiled yesterday and nearly every customer interaction has become, "Buy flavoured Via, $6.95 for a pack of 6. Nah, it's not instant coffee...." The only thing that makes selling Via any fun is experiencing the wide range of consumer reactions. Clay, a fellow barista, was unlucky enough to catch a woman on a bad day (giving her the benefit of the doubt....), offer her a free sample, and be rebuffed with a, "I don't want any of that shit." A simple, "No, thank you," would have sufficed, but ya know.... I was stuck working the front and two women approached the counter, and before I could even offer a sample I was informed in no uncertain terms that "Starbucks's coffee sucks, you people don't know how to make it right." I think she was looking for a reaction.... but I replied with a, "That's nice," and she haughtily ordered a chai and left. Dude, some people are really ridiculous and they all seem to find our store.... Sad day for us.

In other news.... Lexington has been hosting the Equestrian Games, perhaps some of you have watched them on the telly. Yeah, it's kind of a big deal. You can google it for more info cos pretty much all I have to say about them relates back to work and that's no fun.

Ever diligent in my pursuit of bad television, I have begun netflixing True Blood episodes. It's pretty much what one might expect.... like a "grown-up" Southern version of Twilight that lasts a lot longer. But hey, ya gotta have something to get you through the long nights till America's. Next. Top. Model. returns....

And that's about it. Until next time....

Cheers.

Prairie Fire That Wanders About

I thought I detected the odour of forest fire the other day.... but I think I was quite mistaken. We're no longer in Kansas, after all.... We're in Ken-TUH-ky damn it.

My shift at Starbucks was rather depressing today.... After kicking some serious frappe ass in the morning, I was set loose and alone on the bloody damned drive thru (drive thru=fast food, I don't care if you ARE the finest purveyor of coffee in the world) and I funked it up. Ack. And now I've had several hours to sit in solitary confinement and brood on the misery of it all. You know when you've had a particularly bad day punctuated with little bits of humiliation here and there, and the memory of those bits plagues you for hours/days afterwards? Yeah, it's something along those lines. Apparently 3 hours of practical experience and the vaguest knowledge of the menu leaves one qualified to man the drive thru station solo during the After School Rush. I call bs. And now it's ruined my night. Target, why the hell didn't you call?? Why can't I just teach writing at a community college? I'd rather grade memos than make coffee. O Life.

Anyway, I appear to be straddling the line of Emo, so a brisk change in subject is in order. What else to write of?.... as I sit and kill time on the laptop, playing songs that also kinda reek of Emo.... at least they are not set to repeat. OOH, Schmitty burn!

I guess the overwhelming positive is that I have a job and can soon begin to squander millions on shabby chic furnishings for my super-sweet new apartment. I'm also considering a sauna and room for a pony.

Cheers.